Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Call Me Alexander

Alexander had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

Call me Alexander, or Alexandra if you will.

I finally slept pretty well last night. Until the alarm went off. Then a kid got up. Then I tried to go back to bed and snuggle with him. He didn't sit still, he didn't keep quiet, he didn't let me sleep. I nodded off a bit, then the phone rang. Forget it. I give up. Some days are just meant to be rough.

We went downstairs and had breakfast without major incident. The hooligans made a mess and didn't clean it up. I put them in their room so I could take a shower before we ventured out into the world.

Shower was great. I got dressed in my jeans that make me feel good, my rockin' Danskos that my fabulous husband surprised me with several months ago, and even dried my hair and brushed my teeth.

As I was going to the hooligan containment unit, I heard Thomas yelling "MOM, Jerry drew on the wall!"

GREAT! I just love when my kids draw on the walls with utensils that shouldn't be in their rooms. What fascinating surprise will I find this time?

The picture does not do the shark justice. The shark that Jerry supposedly drew is probably 7 feet long. From the door to the closet is shark. Purple shark. Jerry can't draw a stick figure. At this point, I draw better than Jerry, and that says a lot.

"Thomas, let's try this again. And this time, you will tell me the truth."

"I did it," came the pitiful wail.

Sorry bud, no sympathy here.

Then, I turn around to see this little guy on another wall.

Nice. He is kinda cute, though.

I turn to walk out the door while trying to not throw children out the door or sprout 3 heads and scream like a banshee. I see this master work of art on another wall.

LIVID! That doesn't even begin to describe me this morning.

Then, we head over for the previously blogged about Wal-mart trip.

This day really stinks. Big time.

I go to post Michael's birthday pictures and discover my memory card is missing. The living room is still a mess that the hooligans were supposed to take care of.

Time to teach a voice lesson. Send the hooligans to their room. Michael goes down for his nap like a little angel.

Near the end of the lesson Thomas brings me a bag and says "Jerry ate these."

I keep a bag of goodies in my purse. A handful of skittles, starburst, Hersey's kisses. It comes in handy when I need to bribe, I mean reward, my kids.

No rewards today. They had taken my purse up to their room. They ate almost all the goodies in my purse. They found fruit snacks in my purse that I keep for while we are sitting in the carpool line. Thomas took my chapstick, my good chapstick, and tried to clean the crayon off the walls.

I have no magic erasers because I used them all last week and ran out after cleaning the last disaster on the wall, thank you Michael. I have no magic erasers because Wal-mart really messed up my day and I didn't make it to Target to get the great deals on them that my coupons expire today.

Dinner is in the crock pot and will likely burn or not be cooked all the way. That is just what I predict. There is also probably a bill for $34,239,340.17 in my mailbox waiting for me. And I bet my phone will ring to tell me someone died and my fabulous husband was in a wreck and has lost his job. And I probably have an inoperable brain tumor and will need to have my left big toe amputated. And my ears will fall off and my teeth will rot out in my sleep. It is just one of those days.

I quite. I'm done. I am going to bed and not coming out until you can guarantee me it will be a better day.

Anybody want any kids? They are cute and loving and give great hugs. They have blue eyes and blond hair that will melt your heart. They are adventurous and creative. They are problem solvers and will keep you entertained. Both are potty trained and can scavenge their own food.

Hello, my name is Alexandra. I am having a horrible, terrible, no good, very bad day.

I will no go drink a Dr. Pepper and eat junk food.

It Should Have Been Easy

This should have been easy.

Mission: Go to Wal-mart for leftover Sunday newspapers.

What actually happened:

I called ahead to verify that they had the papers. "Yes, we do. They are usually here all week." Perfect! After a shower and a disaster, more on that one to come, we headed out to the store. Me and all three hooligans. Easy is relative.

Park, head inside. No cart necessary, this will be quick. Kids, hold hands. Stay close.

Grab 2 papers, head to check out. Discover that the papers are today, not Sunday. Check out girl says go get the Sunday papers and we will exchange it. Great. No problem. Slight inconvenience, but easy fix.

No papers. Anywhere. I must be blind, they said they are here.

Go back to customer service, which is falsely called such. More like customer headache. Nope, papers have been gone since Sunday night.

Get refund.

Not quite.

I had left my change there with the papers and the clerk because I was coming right back. Clerk refunds me the price of the papers, but puts my previous change back in her drawer. I tell her I should have $3 returned, not $2.42 that she gave me. She tried for all she was worth to convince me that she was right and it all worked out. "My drawer will be short," she says. I try to recount what happened... I gave you $3, you set the change on the papers I was going to exchange, when I returned you put my change from on top of the papers (which I should have just put in my pocket, but was too set on getting the papers) into the drawer, then you refunded me the cost of the papers. I gave you $3, so I should leave with $3. She got irritated and called to have her drawer counted because she was so sure she was going to have her drawer be short.

As this entire saga goes on, the hooligans are losing it. Sitting still, not gonna happen. Sit on the bench, not gonna happen. Keep your hands to yourself, not gonna happen. Everyone around us getting irritated, so gonna happen.

Stress level, continually rising. Anxiety level, not far behind. Irritation level, on the rise. However, in spite of this, I was very nice and polite to the cashier. I was calm and patient and tried to be as kind and understanding and logical as possible.

Cashier grumbles about annoying people who won't let things go when there is a long line. Manager sends her to go work on another register so manager can count. Manager cuts me off when I try to explain to save time and headaches. Another clerk comes and asks if she can help. Manager says she can't run a register, but she can count this one. New clerk was happy to help. New clerk continues to count register and asks me what the amount is and what happened. "I would have just given you the change. Here you go."

Thank you. On my way out.

No time to run to Target. Wal-mart took 72.8 times longer than it should have. Now I have to find some other window of time to make that trip. And the CVS trip. Please, no kids this time. Wishful thinking.

Moral: Nothing is easy, especially with kids.

Secondary moral: Far too many people are lacking in common sense and simple math skills.

Other Secondary moral: Nobody likes to be wrong, even if it is painfully obvious.

What you should know about me: If I am right, I will fight to prove that I am right. I will not give up just to give up if I am absolutely certain I am right. You will not cheat me out of money when I know I am right. I do not like Wal-mart, but they have great deals that keep me coming back, in spite of my distaste for the store. Tight budget means cheap shopping. The store I went to is one of my least favorite locations, but it was the only one with a working phone number where someone answered. Newer locations tend to have people with more common sense, at least in my experience.

Anybody have Sunday ads they want to donate to my coupon binder? I could really use a couple more Tide coupons for the CVS sale this week.

Monday, September 28, 2009


Kid: Michael is about to throw a ball at us.

Mom: Make sure you duck!

Yep, I just qualified myself for the Mom of the Year award. Don't you wish you were as good a mom as I am?


Kid: OUCH! He made me hit my head on the wall.

Mom: Oh well. When you play rough, you get hurt. Now go play some more.

More wrestling ensues.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Michael's Two!

Michale turned two today! I am not exactly sure where all the time went, but it went. I know many moms say that on each birthday, but with each birthday of a kid, I get reminded over and over.

This weekend I have been doing the "at this time two years ago I was...." At lunch on yesterday Lolly mentioned the 1am phone call she got two years ago. If you missed that one, check it out here and relive that exciting day.

CiCi's pizza is one of our family favorites. Can you really beat all you can eat pizza, pasta, and salad, and dessert, and cheap too. Kids 4 and under are free, for crying out loud. Lunch at CiCi's then back home for fun and goodies. Today we had his favorite foods for dinner... Mac N Cheese and Hot Dogs. I even let the hooligans have fruit punch with dinner.

I did manage to get pictures of yesterday and today's fun. I will get those up soon.

Happy Birthday little buddy! We love you bunches and have had so much fun with you for the last two years. We look forward to lots more fun, adventures, loves and hugs. You are one special little boy! You are my favorite 2 year old :)

Wednesday, September 23, 2009


At the beach.
With Aunt Amanda.
In a big squishy chair.
Does life get much better than this?

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Conversations in the Car

This picture is old and completely unrelated, other than being Thomas. But isn't he so sweet?

Do you ever have those days when you wish you could record the conversation and replay it later? All too often those happen in the car. Today was no exception.

Thomas: I want to make Flat Stanley be Dark Vader.

Me: Oh yeah?

T: Yeah. He has a red light saver. Obie Kanobie has a blue one.

M: He does, huh?

T: Yeah. And who is that other guy he is with?

M: I don't know. Obie Kanobie is with lots of people at different times. (Yes, I know it is Kenobie, but I wanted to keep him going because it was so cute and honest)

M: Are you talking about Luke or Anakin or...

T: Luke! He has a green light saver.

T: When I grow up I want a red light saver. I want a real one, not a pretend one. A light saver like they have, not like the candy.

T: The other guy has a green one too.

M: What other guy.

T: The other guy.

M: Can you tell me what he looks like?

T: The little guy, in Star Wars.

M: The green guy?

T: Yeah! The green guy.

M: His name is Yoda.

T: Yeah, Yoda. He has a green light saver too.

Maybe when he gets a little bigger I will tell him that Gingams has hair like Yoda. But that, my friends, is another story for another day. Or maybe not. Maybe you had to be there. Cousins and other unruly family folk, tell me, did you have to be there for that one to be funny?

And the conversations just continued. Different topics, but all just as funny and matter of fact as you can be. I can't even remember everything they talked about, but it was a funny trip home today. Thomas also wants a 3-dollar bill for dress down day, the day they can buy a pass to wear regular clothes and not uniforms.

I love my kids. They are so funny. I think I just might keep them.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Biker Boys

Saturday we all went out for a little mini adventure.

My fabulous husband rides a motorcycle. It is his fun and stress relief. I call him the flying bumblebee because his bike is yellow and he wears a yellow jacket and black pants. He says he is the stunt driver for the Fire Department. Lest you worry about him, he wears safety gear from head to toe.

One of his fun things with the bike is an online biker forum. Not your Hell's Angels or other bad image kind of group. A bunch of middle age careful riders who have fun going out to dinner or chasing pictures. A fun game they play is called TAG. He does the NC tag, but there are other states and even a US tag. Someone posts a picture of their bike at a random location. They don't give much by way of details. The object is to get a picture of your bike in the same location. Then you have to be the first one to post your picture, and you are not allowed to use a previously taken picture. If you are first, you get to post your bike at a new location within 24 hours. My fabulous husband has caught several in the past and we have fun hunting them down from the couch to see if he can go chase it. We call them the Arm Chair Tag Getters. Sometimes someone gets it posted first and you get bruced, but it is still fun.

Anyway, now that you know the game, you can understand the fun. Remember that motorcycle Jerry got for his birthday? Well, here it is again.

My fabulous husband got the tag Saturday morning and we were trying to come up with a new fun one to post for the next chaser to get. He had wanted to get a picture at this location, so I suggested packing up the hooligans and taking then along for the ride and a fun picture.

Cute? Yeah, I think so too.
Jerry with his helmet, or hemet as he says, or haaaaaa as Michael says, and his gloves. It is not unusual to find him riding the bike around the house with a jacket, cowboy boots, mittens, and some sort of head gear. At least he wears all his gear to protect from those rug burns.

The whole crew on the side of the road.

Isn't he cute on the bike too? He's another mitten and cowboy boot kid. Maybe he will get his own bike for his birthday next week.

And then the camera died.

Sorry Thomas. We love you, but the batteries didn't hold out for you. You're too big for the little bike anyway. Maybe we can get a picture of him on his bike next to daddy on the big bike.

We all had fun, which is what the tags are all about.

Random unrelated bit of information that is slightly related... This is the baseball team I sing for. The kids were quite upset we didn't get to go see a game this time. Sorry kids, season is over.

What fun family adventures have you taken recently?

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Can You Hear Me Smiling?

I went shopping tonight.

I went shopping tonight without kids.

I went shopping tonight without kids and took my time.

I went shopping tonight without kids and took my time and saved BIG TIME!

On the way home I called my fabulous husband to tell him about my escapades. He was less than impressed. Thanks to my great friend and incredible mom for sharing in my excitement. They could hear me smiling over the phone. Why was I smiling so huge that I had to call people and share, you ask?

Kroger has great deals this week. You get 10 items and automatically get $5 off your purchase. You can combine as well, so if you have 20 items you get $10 off. Not only are they great deals, they are name brands like Philadelphia cream cheese, Kraft cheese blocks and slices, Pop Tarts, DiGiorno, Edy's ice cream. Yeah, total score on that alone. Then, go and add some coupons on top. Yeah baby! Kroger is also doubling up to $.50, so double score.

The loot... 8 boxes Kraft Mac n Cheese, 2 large Jell-O Pudding, 2 Cream Cheese, 2 Kraft Pepper Jack blocks, 2 Kraft singles, 2 12 count Pop Tart, 2 Nestle chocolate chips, 1 DiGiorno flatbread (Tuscan Chicken, YUM), Edy's Mint Brownie Bites Overload. I also got Tyson boneless, skinless on a good sale and Tostitos chips for my fabulous husband to use with his favorite salsa that I have a stock of, but no chips with which to eat it.

The deals... multiple coupons on cream cheese, cheese, slice cheese, pop tart, chocolate chips, and DiGiorno.

In the ad you could purchase Playtex, Energiser, or Shick items and get $5 off your next purchase. Slight problem... the ad was a misprint and you had to spend $25 on participating products to get the deal. I walked my little self over and returned that Shick I didn't need but bought for $1 to get the coupon.

Grand total... about $25 for everything. SCORE!!!

I also hit it pretty good at Target. Now I get to build my own Coupon Notebook. Digging through my little envelope just didn't cut it tonight. Time to get more put together. Take some time, save some cash. Sounds good to me. And I really like the idea of shopping alone, even if it is when most people are going to bed.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

More Funnies

I'm tired. It's late. Here's a cute quick little funny for you.

This morning Jerry sneezed.

Thomas said "bless you."

Jerry got upset and came over crying.

I told Jerry that Thomas was just being nice. When someone sneezes, we say "bless you" because it is the polite thing to say.

Thomas says, "Yeah, I was just being nice. And when you are alone and you sneeze, you say ble-shme."

You are absolutely right, Thomas.

Get it... blesshoo... bleshme.

Whatever, I'm going to bed.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Funny Words

Kids say some funny things. More often than not they have no idea they are being funny. To tickle your funny bone, here are some of the fun ones around here lately.

Thomas upon hearing and seeing Sound of Music come on TV one night excitedly pointed and said, "Look Mom, it's Mary Poppins!"

Jerry has all kinds of funny almost, but not quite words
swywater is flyswatter
askident or askdident is accident
mint truck is a cement truck

Jerry and Thomas also used to call my sister AaaunTamanda. Drawn out "A" and all run together like that. She misses that. Now I just call her my seeeeeeeeeester.

Michael, among the dog and cow noises, has a new funny. He shakes his little head and says "No doggie, no doggie, no doggie." Sometimes he looks at Daddy and says it and we can't be quite sure if he is saying doggie or daddy. Yesterday, when I went to get him out of bed in the morning, that was the first thing out of his mouth. Today he started doing "no mom," but it didn't last. Or maybe he was doing his best Jamaican accent and saying no mon.

The things they say are so funny and cute. I could even get all sappy and think about how much I will miss the little funnies when they get older. Then I listen to my fabulous husband and the way people laugh at me, like when I tell the kids to get their shoes out of my feet, and realize they will never outgrow it, they just outgrow the cuteness and sweet voices.

Now, if you will please excuse me, I now need to go silence those little sweet voices. Way after bed time and after multiple re-beddings, the words and voices are less than cute.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Interesting Choice

Jerry's favorite color is pink. For some time now he has said this. It wasn't just a one time fluke. Any time you ask what his favorite color is, he says PINK. He points to things that are pink and says they are his favorite color. The boys got balloons this weekend and Jerry picked pink.

Yesterday he said he wanted something to drink. He said "I want the princess cup." I have a plastic cup with angels on it that I got from who knows what event, but probably something at college. Love those Angels! After telling me several times and I had no idea what he was talking about, he went over and got it himself.

Pink and Princesses, that's my Jerry. One of a kind.

*After my fabulous husband read this, he so kindly requested and suggested that I be sure to add that Jerry is all boy, he just likes pink and princesses. If you have no idea how boy he is, just take a look back at all the blogs labeled with his name. Odds are "disasters" will also be one of the labels.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Happy Valentine's Day... in September?

I was going back through my posts recently and putting labels on them. It was fun to go back and read through them and laugh at some of the old disasters. I was reading about one day that I remember being a complete nightmare. While I read it I was crying from laughing so hard. It was a nice reminder that eventually I will look back and laugh at many of the disasters and misadventures that I can only endure in the moment.

Not only did I get a good laugh from reading, but I also got a serious kick to the pants reminder of how far behind I get on posting and how many moments I forget. Today's post was sparked by reading a reference to the event in another post, and seeing the picture pop up on the screen saver this afternoon.

I mentioned that I made a fun surprise for everyone for Valentine's Day. I still am not a fan of the holiday, but I do try to make it fun and special for the kids and my fabulous husband. They deserve a special treat now and then.

This year I found a super cute idea to make candy boxes out of cake. Make the cake, cover it to look like a candy box, then fill it with cake balls instead of chocolates. It didn't come out near as neat as Bakerella's but it was still cute. We made red velvet cake balls with cream cheese frosting then covered in white or milk or mint chocolate, chocolate cake with vanilla frosting covered in white or milk chocolate, chocolate cake with chocolate frosting covered in white or milk chocolate, yellow cake with chocolate frosting covered in milk or white chocolate, and yellow cake with vanilla frosting and covered in white or milk chocolate. Doesn't that just make you hungry?
Cute little boys with their goodies they woke up to find at their seats at the table.

The candy boxes with cake balls. One day I will try again. I learned some things that don't work and others that do. Rushing at midnight to get it done does not work. Trying to hide it all and surprise your husband also does not work.

Upcoming posts, more catching up. Man, am I behind!

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Energetic or Hyperactive?

I am in charge of the children's music at church. For two hours each week, I am the master musician and I work alongside the person in charge of the lesson. I teach songs, gospel principles, and some general music. We have fun. At least we try to. On the months when there is a fifth Sunday we get to do ALL music. It is a fun day, but requires a lot of me and I am wiped by the time I am home.

In order to keep the kids involved and participating, I put on a show. Anyone who has ever been involved in theater knows that you have to do things over the top in order to engage your audience. Kids are not your average audience. My show is not your average show. Kids have the attention span of a gnat, especially if they are less than thrilled about singing.

So what happened August 30?

I had a Dr. Pepper at breakfast. It was there. It was a 2 liter bottle. If I didn't finish it off soon, it would go flat and be nasty. So I had a DP that morning.

I had my activity planned and all ready to go. The kids started coming in and it was time to let the fun begin.

We start with wiggle songs since the kids have been sitting with their parents for an hour already. If we get the wiggles out early, the rest of the time goes much easier. We did our favorite round of who can do Head Shoulders Knees and Toes the fastest, I won again, and finished other announcements and birthdays before it was my turn.


I try to make my time fun for the adults as well as the kids. I throw in little funny comments that generally only the adults will catch. I was having fun, playing with the kids, throwing jokes, and making fun of myself. All the normal things, at least as far as I can tell. I looked to the back and commented that the presidency, those fabulously wonderful women in charge, was laughing at me. One of them said they think I had an energy drink before I came in. Nope, no energy drink, just my usual fun and energetic and exciting self. I didn't see anything different.

As part of the activity I taught them how to conduct music. In 4/4 it works well as floor-door-window-ceiling. To make it easier for them, I exaggerate the movements. I realized I was moving my entire body as I did this and said "I could throw in some Happy Gilmore here and say it's all in the hips," to which one of the adults almost fell on the floor laughing. Glad I could entertain you.

Was I being excessively chatty? Was I more energetic than usual? Was I bouncing off the walls? I was just keeping the kids attention and making music fun for them.

The following week I mentioned to one of the adults that I am always energetic and having fun, see? She said that I am, but last week I was nuts. Maybe weeks without DP and then drinking one with breakfast did have an effect on me.

I think I should stay away from energy drinks. Just a thought. Although, that could be interesting, in a very controlled setting.

BTW, spell check will fix all my shortened alphabet issues for me. Problem solved. For now.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Shorten the Alphabet

My alphabet consists of 25 letters. I know, yours has 26, but mine is one short. Thanks to a little hooligan, I am missing a letter on my keyboard. What ever makes a hooligan think that using a mini screwdriver to pry off a letter is a good idea? After re-attaching several times, it gave up. For a while I could push really hard and get the sensor to work, but now, there is no hope.

The alphabet ends at Y.

That missing letter makes for some interesting scenarios. Words just don't have the same meaning when you use an S instead. Have you ever seen a sebra? Do you find it amasing how much damage three little hooligans can do in 7 seconds flat? Do you have a sister-in-law that you try to call one name and end up calling her a floosie? In that context, floosie sounds better, I think. (It was a joke, really, she is nothing even close. She couldn't be one even if she tried.) I can't tell you to examine your sipper. Oh my, how that meaning changed!

Why don't I just hook up a new keyboard, you ask? Right now, I have a laptop with a broken screen hooked up to the screen of the desktop because the desktop internet doesn't work. Two computers makes one. The hooligans killed the desktop keyboard and the extra keyboard. The same key-prying hooligan also pried off the buttons on my mouse. Two mice. My computer situation is pretty pathetic, but I make do. I am still able to post entertaining stories for my audience that keeps asking for more.

Now, when my words look funny and you think I misspelled the word, remember how my children helped me along this path of insanity. I hope you have an amasing day with many crasy adventures along the way.

My two little hooligans are in the bathroom laughing. I must go investigate. Patience at the ready. More laughter.... now running.

Wednesday, September 09, 2009


I have no idea why this popped into my head. Okay, I do know, but I have no idea why I am posting about it. You would think I could write about something funny that my kids did, or the latest recipe I tried, or post about the birthday in March, school graduation, summer fun, school starting, funny things the kids say, or something relevant or enlightening in our lives. Instead, I sit and post about feet.

Go figure, I'm weird like that.

Last night at rehearsal I noticed a guy who had really big feet. They just caught my attention out of the corner of my eye. Why is it that some people have feet that are unusually large compared the rest of their body, and others have really small feet? Examples, you ask. I am 5' short and I wear a 39 European or 8-ish American. My mother is 5'5" and wears a 6 American and I think a 36 European. Correct me mom, please. My good friend and fellow shoe shopping buddy is 5'6" or so, correct me, and has feet just a touch bigger than my feet. This has recently worked out GREAT for me since I got the shoes she outgrew when her feet grew just enough that her shoes didn't fit. Pregnancy will do that to you. I had smaller feet three kids ago. Thanks for the kicks, I love them all, even if my husband thinks all but one pair are ugly. They are my feet, not his, so he can just get over it. He always does.

Some people are destined to have big feet. Maybe not destined, but you know early on that they will have flippers. Case in point, my shoe shopping buddy again. Love you, mean it. Her little boy is a few months younger than my oldest. As long as I have known that child, he has had flippers. He could put Michael Phelps to shame once he gets older, you know, in 14 years or so. We laugh about the kid's feet. It's his dad's fault. Dad had flippers too. Again, it works great for us since we get the hand-me-downs. Thanks guys, you saved our bacon again. Even her little baby girl had flippers in the ultrasound, but she seems to be growing into hers, so there is hope. Skinny feet look longer anyway.

Feet are weird too. Toes grow at odd angles. Maybe that is from all the pointy toe shoes. Cute shoes are worth it. At least until you try to wear cute sandals and then you are stuck with weird toes in cute shoes. Stick to the cute toe smashers or sandals, I guess. We need to find a solution to this problem. Really, this is a problem.

I can't stand naked toes. On girls, that is. This has made me nuts for as long as I can remember being aware of it. If you plan to wear sandals, please paint your toenails ladies. Please use a dark color, not a super light color that makes you look like you have a foot disease. Barely pastel pink does not work. Dark wine red, so totally works on toes. French pedicure, might as well be naked. Nice on fingers, not on toes. Even worse than naked toes is half-naked toes. When you are missing half or most of the polish, just take off what's left. I must admit that I prefer naked toes to half-naked toes. Sadly, I must admit guilt on both counts. I wore sandals the other day and scraped off what was left of a previous nail color on the toes that were visible. Yep, I cheated. I am ashamed. I must right my wrong. At least I admit my mistake. Please forgive me. It won't happen again. Until I forget on my way out the door and don't see the disaster on my feet until I am in the middle of the outside world. I prefer to not pick at my toes or nail polish when out in public. Don't you agree?

How else are feet weird, you ask? I shall enlighten you. They get super stinky. Did you know this? If you didn't, you must be living under a rock. Or you have no smell like my dad did. Really, he couldn't smell. My mom made him take care of all the stinky diapers. He used to walk in the house and say "Dinner smells good." Silly Daddy.

I have a horrible story about my brother's shoes when he was a kid. Long story short, his favorite dinosaur hi-top shoes had to live out on the deck. Cute shoes, really. The appendage that gets so stinky is also the one we love to have massaged and rubbed and pampered. Pedicure anyone? And yet, as much as we love that attention to our extremities, we laugh and jerk around when someone unexpectedly touches them. My grandfather used to run his finger from your heel to toe if you had your feet where he could reach. Fun memories. I miss him. I miss him making my jump out of my skin when he did that.

Summary: feet do not always match the person they are attached to; please keep your toes painted; feet are stinky; we love some foot love; all those nerve endings make for some super sensitive tootsies when it comes to tickles.

I am now going to prop up my disproportionately large feet, give myself a pedicure, and hide my feet from my husband how now likes to make me jump. And then I will put on some rockin' shoes to show off my fancy toes, even if my husband thinks the shoes are ugly.

That is all for now.

Monday, September 07, 2009

Lighten Up

I know you are totally jealous of me. You should be. Now, to enlighten you as to why you are jealous of me, yet again.

I have under-counter lighting. My kitchen is so bright and happy and cheerful. My counters are clean, for now. My stove top is clean, for now. The hooligans are smiling and oh so excited to be in a picture. Everything is put away and neat. At least so far as you can see. There is a reason the picture is of part of my kitchen and not the entire kitchen. Must keep disasters out of sight. If I don't post it, it must not exist.

Yes, my husband is fabulous. He is crafty. He is handy.

I think I will keep him.

I will loan him out, for a fee.

Now wipe that drool off your chin and come visit us in my nice, bright, lit-up kitchen. I'm baking, again. Molten lava cakes and chocolate cookies with mini Reese's Pieces. Yummy.

Please pardon the Chick-fil-A sandwich wrapper in the background. Today was yet another free food day. Wear your team logo and get a free sandwich. Two rounds in the restaurant and one round of drive-thru window. Free CFA, we're so there.

Saturday, September 05, 2009

Nice Night

Tonight was wonderful around here. We were able to go to the temple this evening, which we are now able to do the first Saturday of the month. Hooray, we are finally regulars! We are so glad they decided to try adding this time to the schedule since it works perfect for our insane life. Our sitters are great, and tonight we had three. I can only imagine the fun the kids had with so many fun people around this evening. Thanks guys!

I am a bit of a control freak. I know, you had no idea. It makes me nuts when I don't know where I am going or what we are doing. Change plans on me and I might just blow a gasket. I just don't deal too well with things like this. Not to say I don't like surprises, but when I am expecting one thing, I get thrown for a loop with the change.

My fabulous husband is well aware of my control freakishness. He very much enjoys exploiting it. On the way home we were moving along on cruise control. Um, that was our exit. I know, he says. Then we pass the next exit option. What is going on? He just smiles and keeps throwing out possibilities that aren't really possibilities. No, dear, we aren't getting gas since BJ's closed at 9 and that was 30 minutes ago.

Not until we are almost pulling in front of Cold Stone do I figure out what he has up his sleeve. My fabulous husband surprised me with Cold Stone ice cream on the way home. You can bet I had a coupon too. He even let me get a waffle cone bowl. So yummy. Yup, he knows what makes me happy.

I think I just might keep him. He's pretty good to me.

Friday, September 04, 2009

Mouse Man

Remember Halloween a couple years ago? Thomas was a cat. Jerry was a Mouse. They were the cutest cat and mouse you ever saw. Get it, Thomas and Jerry were a cat and mouse? Oh, nevermind...

Michael, only one month old, was a super soft and snuggly penguin. My penguin is cuter than your penguin.

Jerry continues to wear the costume. Thomas is a fireman, Jerry is a mouse. Thomas is a missionary, Jerry is a mouse.

This morning Jerry came downstairs dressed as a mouse. I figured it just wasn't a battle worth fighting. Whatever. It's cute. He's cute. At least he was dressed.

We went to the Ear Doctor today. They thought the Cat and Mouse thing was funny. And cute. Even when it got warmer, he kept wearing his little sweatsuit costume. He even took a nap, covered in a fleece blanket. Have you ever looked at a sleeping mouse. They are quite cute.

My little Mouse Man.

I think I remember my dad being called Mouse Man too. My dad's name is Jerry. He had a friend they called Stamper. Don't ask, I don't know the whole story. I'm sure someone will enlighten all of us now that I have said this.

Jerry, meet Mouse Man aka Jerry. Mouse Man, meet Jerry aka Mouse Man. I sense a connection here.

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

You're On

Alright Tiffany, may I call you Tiffany? You're on!

Remember that coupon lady/site I blogged about yesterday? Well, she's got my attention again. She offered up a challenge, and I love a good challenge. I especially love a challenge that I can win. Even better, a challenge that is good for me. Ms. Tiffany wants to be healthier. Me too. She needs to be held accountable for working on it. Me too. She is holding herself accountable by blogging about her progress weekly. And, she wants her readers to do the same. Misery loves company, perhaps?

We are all busy, goodness knows I don't even want to see her schedule. It must be color-coded and down the the 20 second interval in order to keep up with everything she has going on. We can all come up with excuses, no matter how bad they are. My latest is "the gym closed so I don't have child care or the chance to take a shower afterwards anymore." Sounds good to me, but also a bit pathetic.

Here we go. I'm still not sure what I am going to do. Even pushing the hooligans in the stroller is doing something. However, you get to bother me about it and keep me going. Tiffany challenged us for 12 weeks. I can do this. My last race was in February, so it's been a while. Even if I don't register and run another race soon, I have my nifty spifty watch that times me.

Enough excuses. I'm going to win this challenge. I can do this. LET'S GO!

Tuesday, September 01, 2009


I try to be good with coupons, I really do. I clip while sitting in carpool. I sort before going to the store. I pile store sales and coupons on top of manufacture coupons. I scour the store ads to plan shopping.

Recently, a few months ago, I stumbled upon a great blog that is helping me out. She's in Texas, but Target and Wal-Mart and Walgreens and CVS are everywhere. She tells you what to buy, where to get the coupons, and how to get the best deals. She even takes pictures of her shopping trips to either encourage you with what she did, or make you feel like a shmuk because you couldn't do as well as she did.

She also teaches you how to organize your coupons. Go check her out. Her shopping will encourage and her stories will make you laugh.

I feel inspired to go to BJ's and get the rockin' double binder that she is giving away. It's on sale for $11.99, but it doesn't come with all her cool stuff inside. Maybe I can fly to Texas for a private coaching session!